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         the unknown is like 
 a Cargills Seeds Soil Thermometer
 a most versatile item
 the thermometer is
 built into a flat pointed stick
 like a paint-stirring stick
 but just a little thicker
 the thermometer is embedded
 in the stick
 the temperature scale
 printed on both sides of the wooden slot
 so that you can safely jab it
 (the Cargill's Seeds Soil Thermometer)
 into the damp lush
 dirt of your garden
 that holds and feeds
 your pumpkins lounging
 like golden gods after an orgy
 that has left them
 engorged and comatose
 on the far left side
 of the Cargills Seeds Soil Thermometer
 is another scale
 in inches
 so that you can measure the depth
 of a snowfall
 or a monsoons worth of rain
 or the length of a spider web
 or your cats tail
 and given
 that the inches scale starts
 at zero inches
 but the zero
 is placed on a line
 that has at least an inch
 of pointed wood below it
 the Cargills Seeds Soil Thermometer
 in a simple
 but ultimately profound way
 suggests the existence
 of negative numbers
 numbers that exist only
 in the brain
 numbers that cant be
 physically represented
 in the real world
 show me 3 apples for example
 of course there are those who would retort
 all numbers exist
 only in the brain
 show me a 5
 not five things
 a 5
 you point to the 5
 on the Cargills Seeds Soil Thermometer
 thats not a 5
 thats the sign for 5
 yes but in this case
 the sign and the thing
 are identical
 thats horseshit
 and besides you just screwed your own argument
 if thats a 5 i dont have to show you 3 apples
 just give me some paper
 and ill create a 3
 ex nihilo
 and you will be astounded
 ive always wondered
 is horseshit worse than bullshit
 its used less frequently
 which would suggest that it is reserved
 for those times that demand
 a more powerful expletive
 and isnt it interesting that we abbreviate
 bullshit as b.s.
 but we dont abbreviate
 horseshit as h.s.
 for obvious reasons I guess
 since b.s. flows off the tongue
 much better than h.s.
 and you can say bull and imply
 the shit
 but you cant do the same with horse
 and finally at the top of the stick
 a hole
 from which to hang
 the Cargills Seeds Soil Thermometer
 on a nail
 pounded into one of your walls
 and bent back just enough to make a hook
 so that it
 the thermometer not the nail
 can perform
 yet one more service
 recording and displaying
 for your sensual pleasure
 the current temperature of the air
 
 and thats how it is with the unknown
 
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